Friend Flirting
What should you do if your brother’s friend comes on to you? Ugh. Relationships are complicated enough without adding in the brother factor. If you’re interested in this guy’s attention, there’s a question of loyalty for everyone involved. If you’re not, it can be just as hard to handle in a different way. Triangles are notorious for leading to stressful situations. Here are some points to consider should you find yourself in this messy situation!
1. Talk to your brother. He is in the middle and has the least to gain, no matter how it turns out. If his friend doesn’t treat you well, he has to be ready to defend you. If the relationship does work out, he might be unhappy about losing time to spend with his friend. Explain to him how you feel, either way. You don’t need his permission to date his friend but sharing your feelings is the right thing to do. This gives your brother a chance to tell you how he feels. Everything gets harder if you are not communicating honestly.
2. You have to face the possibility that your brother might not like the idea or might tell you not to hang out with his friend anymore. Think of it as a case of sibling rivalry with your brother’s friend the object of jealousy.
3. You should be open to the idea your brother might know things about this guy that you don’t and he might be protective of you. Maybe he has a girlfriend or has a history of cheating. Listen to what your brother says. Be respectful of his wanting to take care of you.
4. After you straighten out your brother, try to decide what it is you want from his friend and what he is offering. The ugly truth is that guys will make out with you because they can. Because teenage boys are pretty much walking hormones, it doesn’t always mean that they like you and want to have a relationship with you. It might just mean they like making out with you.
5. Let him make the first move. DON’T ask him out on a date. DON’T call him. As your brother’s friend, he should be more respectful toward you than any other girl. If he doesn’t appreciate your integrity, forget it. You should never be pressured to do anything you do not want to do. Listen to your gut. If you are uncomfortable, this is not how healthy relationships make you feel.
6. Family is forever. Boyfriends come and go. Be aware that if you break up, he might still be coming by on a regular basis to see your brother.
7. A boyfriend should have the same ingredients as your friendships: good communication, honesty, and respect. He should make you feel good about who you are and safe when you’re with him. Communication and trust are key to any successful relationship—and even more so when there are sticky side issues.
Info from BeingGirl.com
